Something Wicked

My first sense to regain awareness was my nose. Damp, musty, a hint of mildew, and something sour I couldn't quite place. My skin awoke; the air was still and wet. My ears burned for sensation but there was no audible sound. I opened my eyes...darkness.

A darkness so thick, I could feel it. My nerves were on edge as was the hair on my neck. The sour unplaceable smell moved, yet without sound. Then I felt a breath across my ear. It hissed quietly and with a light crackle. The breath was hot and carried a stench with it that could only be described as rotting. I tried to turn my head and pain shot from the base of my spine to the top of my head. It was then that I realized that I was bound tightly to a chair. The clothing I could feel consisted of old ragged pants with countless holes, no shirt, no shoes, no service for me. The breath that crossed my ear moved to my face and I could hear what sounded like a tongue tasting the air around me. I suppressed the early symptoms of panic as fear grew within me. Fear of the unkown, claustrophobia, and the fear of pain. My body wanted to struggle and fight my bonds; but instead I held deathly still.

A vile, scratchy voice drenched with contempt for me spoke...

"I own you, and no one can save you..." The most hideous laughter I've ever heard burst from my tormentor. My face was sprayed with spittle and the foul breath of death. I felt the blood drain from my face as I realized the smell I couldn't place was the stench of death...of rotting flesh. This thing was going to eat me alive...

I tried to scream but the sound wouldn't come. I sat there paralyzed, my mouth gaping open, my eyes bulging. My heart pounded and my breath was rapid and shallow. I began to lose my composure and I tried to fight the bonds that held me. I commanded my arms and legs to move but they ignored me. The cackle of my tormentor increased and suddenly...

I was blasted with heat from behind. The room was bathed in dancing light from a fire that had burst into existance behind me. The light pierced my eyes and pain shot through my head but I couldn't close them because what I saw froze my eyelids. I gazed into the eyes of my captor...my owner. The face was twisted and scarred. The eyes burned with hatred. The mouth contorted into a vicious smile showing blackened teeth. It leaned toward me and laughed that hideous laugh. Tears burst from my eyes and I was overwhelmed by horror... The face I stared into was my own...

My eyes popped open, I sat bolt upright in bed and emptied my stomach onto the hardwood floor. I was drenched in sweat, my hair stuck to my face and shoulders; I was still overwhelmed with horror. My fear began to subside as I realized it was only a dream. I breathed relief and reached into my night stand. I pulled out a pipe and filled it with my drug of choice hoping to draw some comfort from it. I sparked my lighter and inhaled deeply...Again the blood drained from my face; the smoke tasted like death and that laugh from my nightmare burst through my ears... "I own you!!!"

I tried to drop the pipe and lighter but they had a mind of their own. The flame bit the drug and the smoke pushed it's way into my lungs. I drifted higher, my body relaxed but my mind was unfulfilled. I could see myself, involuntarily I drew on the pipe trying to drown my problems...I was the one drowning instead. I watched as my body collapsed in a heep on the floor and twitched for a few seconds, the eyes rolled back in its head. I gazed around but was alone, silence surrounded me. Things began to grow dark and I felt myself slipping away into oblivion...drifting. Hopelessness settled on me and I felt death beckoning me to let go.

Then there was something... I thought I was imagining again. Out of the silence came a knock and a still small voice...

"Behold I stand at the door and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me."

My vision blurred and I saw a door. I suddenly knew who was behind it. I had heard of Him and I had been running from Him my whole life. As I reached for the door handle I heard a screech behind me...

"NOOOO!!"

I closed my hand around the knob, opened the door, and welcomed Jesus into my life; the cry behind me was silenced instantly. He delivered me that moment but my recovery was long and I am still growing in Him today.